Victoria Slotto offered a new challenge at dVerse–the Tilus. It is a form described as:
Tilus [tee-loo-hz] is a form created by Kelvin S.M. and falls under the category of micro poetry. The form is divided into two parts: the first part is composed of two lines following a 6-3 syllable count; the second part, a one-syllable word to close and/or complete the subject layered in the first part. The whole piece must, only, contain 10 in overall syllable count. The main focus of Tilus is on the world of Nature, and how it can open a new door to a wider understanding of life and beyond. The form aims to be epic in emotions expressed, more importantly, than to be epic in words.
So close to the haiku form, it was irresistible.
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into this summer sun
face upturned
blind
walking further from shore
crashing waves
fade
thunderstorms where you are
through the phone
whispers
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dVerse — Meeting the Bar
Shiteki Na Usagi 
Love this new form and gave it a try. Yours is so beautiful. Thank you. I will keep trying.
Melanie
bd
Melanie,
Thank you for your visit and for attempting the form. I’m sure Kelvin, the creator, will be pleased. I’m off to read it.
I like that your tilus told different sides of the world—one that has summer heat while the other on a rage of coming storm. You’ve made an unexpected turn that I greatly like as i love surprises. Thank you so much for trying your hand at Tilus & giving us an exquisite result.
P.S. i have missed this at the dverse, my apology.
smiles.
kelvin s.m.,
Quite happy to offer these and very pleased you liked them. Thank you for visiting and leaving your thoughts on my attempts. May we meet and Tilus again soon.
Oh my! Must try! 🙂 Thanks for posting… still so love your blog and appreciate your presence.
jruthkelly,
And I love yours. My spirits always lift after reading there. Thanks for your presence and words here. 😀 Let me know if you post any Tilus.
Big hugs… I’ll keep you posted!
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I like your collection here, but the last one was my favorite. I can hear the thunder through the phone. It is such a distant image.
biggerthanalasagna,
🙂 Thanks for visiting and commenting. The last is my favorite today, at least today it is. Btw, love the name (biggerthanalasagna).
Thanks! You can also call me Heidi. 🙂
Heidi,
Thank you. Remind me if I forget. 😉
this form fits the poetic rabbit very well – nice.
billgncs,
So it does. 😉 Thank you for visiting the rabbit hole.
I enjoyed your tiluses. I think the second one is my favorite.
Gabriella,
Glad you visited and found a favorite. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
love them all…i feel fading waves and whispering thunders have many stories to tell…
Sumana,
😀 Many stories to tell, I like that. That moves them into the “good” category. Thank you for your visit and comment.
like all three very much – but the whispers on the phone – that is just wonderful! K
K,
Welcome here and thank you for your visit and comment. Happy I could share these with you.
Like what you did with this poetry style.
slpmartin,
Thank you. It was fun and only a slight shift from haiku. Loved Aunt Bea’s latest, btw.
I like the seeming contrasts in each tilus but particularly the last one ~ Thunderstorms & whispers through the phone, I like ~
Grace,
Yay. Glad someone liked that one. I actually like that one best as well. I think it tells a story, yet a different story depending on what one brings to it. Thank you for letting me share it with you.
I spent a lot of time in the ocean when I was young–growing up in California. The second one sparked a nice memory for me. All are lovely and it’s good to “see” you–it’s been a while!
Victoria,
I suspect my sister, also a beach lover, would like the ocean verse best. Thank you for reading and commenting. It has been a while. I’ll try to keep the times in-between much shorter.
Oh that second one 🙂 I can see a haji poet in your verse
Björn,
Happy to read your comment. Glad my better tendencies shone through.
ah i’m glad you couldn’t resist….thunderstorms, waves and sun… hmmm nice.. enjoyed all three of them… just sat in the garden a bit, turning my face sunward – it wasn’t so warm though but it felt so good
claudia,
Thank you for reading. It is a bit warmer here. I sat in the sun for a bit waiting for my ride. The breeze here makes that feel so nice. Can’t sit too long though. I’ll add to the freckle count and walk away with sunburn. 😉
as long as you re-appear after disappearing under those waves you are good…
ha. def dont look at the sun too long…
brian,
Oops, I really didn’t intend it in that direction from the shore. Just shows you how readers can open one’s eyes to new possibilities. I’m definitely staying on the shore.