The space on the wall

She's the girl with the sign "not For the feint of heart".
When looking from the outside in, she seems to be smiling and
cleaning up a mess. But when you go
for a closer look you can tell that she smiles
to divert your attention to her face from her scars. And
her body is a time line filled with dashes and 
moments that have their own story's and dates.
But when you ask her what's wrong she presses 
her lips together to form the words "it's okay" and 
tries to choke back the pills so she won't
be depressed anymore and 
hide her tears because she's so 
scared of being hurt that she pushes
you away. She hides in the solidarity of her room and 
finds solace in music with a sharp pain 
at the end. She reaches for the sky as if
waiting to take flight believing that by putting 
distance between her and this place it'll form a great chasm 
between her and her pain as if her pain is tied to
the town that she's stuck in. It's The name and 
labels that have been placed on her that cause an effect of more
psychological damage than any physical one. There is never
time for her damage to be healed because 
every day there is a new label and every hour
there is a new name, yet she continues to smile until
she mouths the words "it doesn't matter" and
she will go home to the comfort of her room and
find a new way to paint, she will paint a mural of her past
sorrows that plague her every waking thought. And
she will paint till there is no space on the walls.

(jas -- Another poem from my youngest with line breaks from Mom. )
The painter

The painter (Photo credit: jaci XIII)




					
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About Yousei Hime

This is the journal of a poetic rabbit. Within the warren you'll find poetry, short stories, essays, art, book and movie reviews, and other odds and ends. If you happen to meet the fey princess, be courteous. This rabbit did and was forever changed.
This entry was posted in By My Children, Favorite Poems by Others, Free Verse, Poetry and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to The space on the wall

  1. I think this would make a great spoken word piece. Does your son ‘read’ anywhere in public or at school? I’m not being ‘nice’ here. I think this would stand quite well next to other pieces I’ve heard from young poets finding their voices. Encouragement is the name of my comment game. Especially because of the subject matter–labels say it all.
    Interesting use of the ‘solidarity of her room’–as in the word -solidarity- a oneness with a literal space and location of her own domain. I like that word ‘play’.
    Hello.

    • Yousei Hime says:

      47whitebuffalo,
      I agree! I also thought this would make a wonderful spoken word piece. I’ve been to some local poetry slams, and I might even read it at one. My son’s school does/did have coffee hour during their lunch blocks. He’s sung there before. I’ll suggest he read one of his poems. The solidarity bit is my favorite part too. I’ll make sure he reads your comment. He has written two more poems, which I will post this week.

  2. ayala says:

    So sad, a great write.

  3. Morgan says:

    this is remarkable for one so young…truly gifted. Thank you so much for sharing 🙂

  4. brian miller says:

    wow they did really nicely capturing the character of this girl..her mannerisms…ugh our dependency on chemicals to set our mood as well..they are not all bad but i have seen so much abuse…and the pushing of others away…def a reality..

  5. Tony Maude says:

    If only we could paint away our pain; sadly we can’t. There are some powerful observations in this piece by your son, and some brilliant lines too. Pass on my congratulations to him.

  6. Misky says:

    An exceptional write. Well done to your young one.

  7. This is excellent writing … your son is gifted in compassion and observation skill… the descripion of the girl is so well written. Loved what you did here

  8. claudia says:

    oh wow… intense emotions in this…and love that she has the painting as an outlet for the emotions… great job by your youngest… how old is she…?

  9. So raw and honest…strong writing that really pulls you in. Excellent write!

  10. ManicDdaily says:

    Yikes– this is so very sad and memorable. It reminds me (though it’s better!) of a poem I wrote once about a soldier who was a burn victim. The dashes on the skin are so strong. K.

  11. Excellent work haunting, powerful, very profound character depiction. I can relate as well

  12. Lindy Lee says:

    Sad reality of life…

  13. What strikes me is the honesty and depth of emotion expressed. This is so very good.

  14. slpmartin says:

    What a powerful poem…the emotions expressed very poignant…and captivate this reader.

  15. mareymercy says:

    Lovely! Beautiful those last few lines.

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