NaHaiWriMo Day 21

your arm around my shoulders sorrow’s umbrella

Crying soldiers

rabbit’s white-green umbrella — winter pine boughs

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About Yousei Hime

This is the journal of a poetic rabbit. Within the warren you'll find poetry, short stories, essays, art, book and movie reviews, and other odds and ends. If you happen to meet the fey princess, be courteous. This rabbit did and was forever changed.
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18 Responses to NaHaiWriMo Day 21

  1. Raven says:

    I was here yesterday but forgot to comment … forgive me. Yousei, I think that this might amuse you. So, I get notification of your poem for yesterday. I open this on my iPhone. It presents (I suppose because it is on a small screen) as one piece. I read it and I read it over and over as one Haiku. I am thinking this is disjointed, this should not be all together. I’m thinking oh dear, I don’t like this at all … too much pushed together. Just think how glad I felt when I came here upon my computer and saw two Haiku! Delightful.

    • Yousei Hime says:

      Raven,
      Funny how the phone screen translates posts sometimes. I’ve posted from my phone a few times, only to go back and fix it on the laptop. I’m glad you came back and viewed it again from the “big” screen. Thanks for sharing this story too. 😀

  2. Maria Tatham says:

    These are wonderful, Yousei!

  3. slpmartin says:

    How strong the sadness is in those few words and image.

  4. sandy says:

    I love both of them. The first brought tears to my eyes.

  5. Umbrellas appear
    sudden downpour starts
    sprouting mushrooms

    Not my finest but open for improvement.

    • Yousei Hime says:

      fiercebuddhist,
      I think every haiku is a starting point to a better one. Sort of like stepping stones through a garden. We move toward the spot we desire, admiring and coveting a bit along the way. I’m always wishing my garden had this or that. Thanks for stopping in and sharing.

  6. Fergiemoto says:

    The first haiku is especially moving.

  7. “Sorrow’s umbrella” — a very moving thought and poem. Like the second one too. Ellen

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